Mixed Feelings

I'm sitting in the back room of studio, looking out at Campo de Fiori, listening to the constant hum of conversation and music. And I can see into someone's window. It's their dining room; the family is having dinner together. Dessert, I guess I should say. There are a lot of wine bottles in the middle of the table, and raucous laughter fills the air that doesn't reach me. One of the windows above gives me a view of someone in their living room, reading a book on a couch. So quiet, even though my line of vision is interrupted by sound waves from Campo.

Off in the background, I see tables set up outside of a restaurant in one of the streets, not even three doors away from these apartments. It's so strange to see this; I sometimes forget that there's such a thing as an intimate family setting in Rome. I've never experienced it.

I do miss the family setting, though. My own family, of course.

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Project 3 has just about reached its midway point, with Part II of III being due on Thursday afternoon. First, we carefully reproduced a palazzo facade. Now, we're in the analytical stage: by just looking at the facade, we must sketch on our boards, on site, and also use other media. Ideally, we would visit our sites since most of these palazzi are existing. My particular building, Palazzo Borghese (not Villa), is still the family's home and is not open to the public. Usually. Once in a while, they may open their doors and allow visitors to enter the courtyard and select rooms. Unfortunately, today was not my day. So here I am, sitting in the back room of studio, looking at my rendered facade, using it as a basis.

And blogging...

Half of my board is filled at this point. I would like to be further than this, because I see this part of the project as a sketchbook page. But my sketchbook pages aren't even 1/4 the size of this sheet, so I find myself hesitating to draw bigger.

I need to learn sometime, though, right...?

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About one more month to go. I have mixed feelings about the end of this semester.

and when i'm gone...

please speak well of me. - the weepies

i've been away

a year and a day.

you recognized love

after the fact.

you did what you did,

and that was that.

don't say words that you don't mean.

and when i'm gone, please speak well of me.

looking back now,

i only wish i had been kinder.

did i ever know love?

and could i have been blinder?

don't say words that you don't mean.

and when i'm gone, please speak well of me.

don't hold back all your love,

or someday.....

i would say that i'm sorry

if it would do any good.

but to never regret

means you have to forget,

and i don't think that i could.

don't say words that you don't mean.

and when i'm gone...

please. speak well of me.

Wah-oh!

While I'm working on my history project, here is the final product of the photography workshop with Stanley this past week! What a fun project; I want to do it again.

In fact, I took a series of pictures around and on Tiber Island after leaving studio early this afternoon. I think I know what I'm going to do later. :)

Lisa, Corin, and I enjoyed this project a lot. Ours may not be the most architectural, but it focuses more on the experience of Via del Corso as a lively, colorful street that connects two major sites, Piazza del Popolo and Piazza Venezia, with Basilica San Carlo in the middle, our starting point. Just as we experienced a lot of funny and unusual things on our trek, our slideshow is full of humor and little dedications to memorable strangers here and there.

Did everybody say what a good day that it was

For everybody who said what a good day that it was?

Did they smile 'cause they liked it?

Did they smile 'cause they liked it?

Did they?

Wah-oh!

The Gravity

Today, we present our finished projects assigned during Stanley Hallet's visit to Rome. For the past week, we studied the different ways to capture architecture in the city as well as the experience of people around. Through the lens of a camera, we discovered how passersby interact with each other and the buildings around, what catches people's eyes, and noticed the fluid motion of the city. It was a fun project, and now I feel like I could very quickly become addicted to telling stories through pictures and music.

Next week is another regular one -- and when I say "regular," take note that I'm attempting to encompass everything we do in a week, from studying the urban fabric of Rome in the classroom to becoming involved in it on our spare time. We will continue with Project 3 (which is much like Projects 1 and 2 but on a grander scale that is to be carried out with all the lessons we've learned and taken from the previous).

And then.....

• Southern Italy for a week.
• A week or two of school again (not sure, can't remember right now).
• Easter break.
• Final week.
• And then I check out of Rome, hop on a plane, and set foot in Philadelphia again.

Going back to semesters at CUA's main campus is going to be a rude awakening.

Or maybe this semester was the rude awakening to CUArch's overall curriculum. For there's definitely something here in the Rome study abroad program that's different from everything I've yet covered.

Duh, how about -- "I'm in Rome"?

Well, yes.

But while there's the aspect of taking a vacation in The Eternal City and beyond, this program is very practical. In some ways, I believe that studying the fabric of a city to understand it is more important than designing one building. It goes past the singular projects that we've had in studio before, in which we design and fit a building on a site, taking into consideration the context, concept, etc.

For the past few months, I've been studying nothing but the workings of a city itself. A brilliant, dilapidated, forgotten, rediscovered, thriving city that's lasted not centuries, but millennia. The same gravity that's pulled down part of the Colosseum is the same gravity that allows it to stand today. It holds everyone down and makes everything one entity.

Sometimes, as I walk around on my own whether I'm just going to class or wandering aimlessly, I feel like the gravity here is stronger. I could just be walking in a different layer of the atmosphere that I'm imagining, a layer of pride and a sense of belonging.... much closer to the ground... The people here are so embedded in their culture. I know I've written this before, but I wonder if they know. Are they aware that they are the seams holding this place together?

I guess this happens in any foreign city that you've been in for "too long." I've become detached from my own culture, but I'm not quite here. So where am I? Outside, looking in.

I'm running out of time here. It's as if the wind is snatching it away from me and I can't run fast enough to catch up. I can't believe I once thought that 4 months was a long time.

Notti come questa moriranno presto.

Finalmente, leggendo il mio libro italiano, Io Sono Febbraio. L'ho comprato la settimana scorsa dalla Libreria Fahrenheit 451!

Finally, I'm reading my Italian book, I Am February (the English title is Light Boxes). I bought it last week from Bookstore Fahrenheit 451!

The debut of novelist/poet/author Shane Jones, this short book tells the story of a city whose inhabitants are oppressed by a god-like ruler who calls himself February. They are forever stuck in the corresponding wintry month, forbidden to practice any of their hobbies in flying kites, hot air balloons, or even watching birds in flight. Anything having to do with the freedom for which they yearn, really.

Throughout the unending month, adults fall into a deep depression and children begin to disappear (or worse). When Bianca goes missing, Thaddeus challenges the dictator and wages war on February to get his daughter back.

It's a pretty dark story; not a children's book, even though it may look like it to some (the format of pages is also designed, not all of them are full of words). I'm not entirely sure why it's called Light Boxes, but I'll find out as I continue to read, which is what a good title is supposed to do. I've heard of this novel before, but never looked for it. I came across it again when I wandered into Fahrenheit 451, a small bookstore next to studio.

The first day I went in, I saw the book across the room, picked it up, read what little I could understand, and put it down because I didn't have enough money with me to purchase it.

The next day I went in, I looked for it again with a purse full of Euro. No sign of Io Sono Febbraio on the table. I walked through the extensive hallway, stopping in each little bump of a room to check out the shelves. I could've asked the shopkeeper if they had another one in stock, but then other people started filtering in through the entrance, and my insecurity in speaking Italian pushed me out the door.

The third day I went in was during Spring Break, more than a month later. I almost forgot that I wanted to learn Italian by reading that particular novel. But the bookstore always catches my attention because it's named after one of my favorite books, and it's such a cozy shop with a humble entrance. Matt was with me this time. We spent a few minutes browsing, but I mainly went in to find my book, purchase it, and leave. I walked out with it in my hands. You're mine now, I thought.

Tanti Auguri!

Today is the 150th birthday of the Unification of Italy!

Once midnight arrived, fireworks were set off at the Altare della Patria, or Il Monumento Nazionale a Vittorio Emanuele II, or Il Vittoriano, or The Wedding Cake. I didn't know that there would be celebrations at midnight..! Luckily, I was able to watch from the kitchen with Marisa and Rebecca.

Carnevale during spring break

Mosques, Hans, and Bedestans

I suppose I should tell you what I did in Istanbul, now that you know how much I love it there.

Day 1

- Goodbye, Rome! Hello, Istanbul! aka Goodbye, Europe! Hello, Asia! -- flying and landing

Mountains in Greece that we passed on the way

- Goodbye, Asia! Hello again, Europe! -- driving from the airport to our hotel

- HELLO, Hagia Sophia, Blue Mosque, and Asia in the distance, what's up??

Hotel Arcadia, 702 with Claire! This is what we saw every day. Blue Mosque, with Hagia Sophia just off to the left.

- We had a lovely group dinner in the hotel restaurant after everyone got situated in their assigned rooms. It was on the top floor of the building, just above 702, and we all got our first taste of real Turkish food. It was delicious! Lezzetli! Thanks, Google Translate... If only I knew this word during the trip, though!

- After dinner, we went walking around Sultanahmet Square and around the Blue Mosque and Hagia Sophia. I had to mentally prepare myself for what the next few days would bring.

Day 2

- I didn't wake up at 5:30am when the prayer calls echoed from the mosques. I wish I had.

- But I did wake up early enough to enjoy a nice shower, get ready for the day, and walk into the restaurant for breakfast to be greeted by huge bowls of assorted honey....

- The very first place we went to visit was Hagia Sophia. I could barely bring myself to sketch anything, but I tried. Everything caught my eye. After I got started, though, I realized what I wanted to focus on while studying in Istanbul: the many geometric designs that took the place of iconography. I wanted to know if there was any pattern or underlying rule to their construction and designs.

Everyone stood on Xs carved into the floor, and we outlined the footprint of the dome.

- We also visited the Basilica Cistern across the street. I automatically love anything underground. Water seeped through the earth and dripped onto the wooden boardwalk that wove between columns, landing on some of us as we walked along to see two carvings of Medusa's head. There were also fish in the water :)

- Spice Market! We went through a short orientation and then split up for lunch. I tried Turkish pizza for the first time (but didn't know that's what it was until much later in our trip), and bought fresh Turkish delight/lokum. Mmm, rosewater...

- Visited the New Mosque (so many pigeons!), sketched some more -- I felt more confident after warming up at Hagia Sophia.

- That night, I went to a hamam with Marina, Adrienne, and my friends. Translated into "Turkish bath," the hamam was quite an experience. I'd never even been to a spa... but this was absolutely wonderful and relaxing. I wanted to go again before returning to Rome, but there wasn't enough time for me to do everything I wanted. I guess I'll have to go back. :)

Day 3

- Visited some more mosques, got better at taking off my shoes without stumbling, sketched a lot...

- But we were also introduced to the hans in the area of the Grand Bazaar, the places where merchants stay and create their goods. Eric is a long-time friend of someone who sells carpets, who endearingly introduced himself as Uncle Izmet. His assistant, Irhan (?), guided us through the Grand Bazaar, pointed out a couple of shops that we might like to check out, as well as gave us the rare privilege of seeing one of the oldest hans.

We also got to walk on the roofs of some. :)

Day 4

- Mosques, mosques, mosques galore! It'd take a loooong time for me to get bored with them. If I could, I would sit in the Blue Mosque for hours on end and sketch all the tiles I came across. By Day 4, I noticed a trend in the geometric designs: everything is based off of increments or divisions of 3 or 7, both significant numbers in religion. I also noticed some 5s. I must have looked a little funny, studying carvings and tiles so closely while everyone else is looking at domes; counting and reading them while strangers walked past.

- Of course there are things to see other than mosques and the bazaars. Istanbul is home of one of the world's best archaeological collections, and we weren't far from the museum. I spent over 2 hours walking through the main building to see artifacts from Turkey, Greece, and Egypt. Unfortunately, the museum closed and I was forced to leave without setting foot inside the other two buildings. :(

Scarabs are my favorite artifacts of Ancient Egypt, which is my favorite ancient civilization to learn about.

Details of a Lycian Sarcophagus.

The last four pictures you just saw are of one tomb. The Alexander Sarcophagus, dated to the 4th c. BC. Let me say this again. 4th century, BC. Can you do this? 'Cause I can't.

- Then, shortly afterwards, I realized I was on my own.

Oh, well maybe they're past the gate and they're waiting for me.... Nope.

Welll.... down the road a bit..? Nah.

But that's okay. I love exploring new places on my own.

I called Marina, ended up talking with Eric, and let them know that I was left behind but was perfectly fine. Everyone else went to Izmet's carpet shop; I missed out on learning about how to inspect them, but I didn't mind at the time.

I didn't go far because I'd been in Istanbul for barely 4 days, but it was nice to move at my own pace and wander where I pleased. I ended up going into this shop a little past the Basilica Cistern where I bought myself a nice, warm pashmina scarf, since my yellow one from India is more suitable for warmer weather (quite the opposite of what we experienced in Istanbul). Now that I'm writing about this, I realize that I haven't even looked at my other scarf since I bought this one. New security blanket? I think so.

Day 5

- We began by taking a break from seeing mosques in order to explore some more hans and bedestans. In the second or third one that we went to see, we met an old man named Mehdi. I'm not sure where he came from, he kind of just appeared out of nowhere while we were taking pictures of old hallways..... But he was very friendly, and once he knew that we were studying architecture, he charitably gave us permission to go on the roof. After unlocking the door and escorting us up the crumbling steps, Mehdi let us wander around this hidden gem for a good amount of time.

New Mosque in the distance.

- Afterwards, we headed back to the Grand Bazaar, had a wonderful lunch at a restaurant called Havuzlu, and then split up to go shopping/bargaining/haggling. I ended the day with bömba (?) tea: regular çay (black tea) with mint leaves, hibiscus flowers, and a slice of lemon. I thought apple tea was my favorite during our stay, but I was wrong.

Day 6

- Our last full day in Istanbul! :(

- It was sunny!! :D

- First stop: Topkapi Palace. We focused mainly on the architecture in the Harem. I spent about 45 minutes walking around, and then another 45 minutes studying and sketching two rooms in particular: the twin kiosks, or the apartments of the crown prince. I was so fascinated with it, for some reason.

Maybe Carlo Scarpa is the reincarnation of this architect...

One room of the Twin Kiosk

Stuck in the drain, Snake Eyes?

- I finally got the chance to see Izmet's carpet shop! We were invited to have lunch with him. And what did we have? Turkish pizza!

- Carpets everywhere... My favorite part? Walk all over them. It makes them more valuable... There were carpets everywhere. They made walls and floors. It reminded me of a recurring dream I used to have as a little kid... I was tempted to get a smaller rug, but I ended up not doing it. It gives me another reason to go back.

- While we were having lunch and looking at rugs and carpets, I tried Turkish coffee.... for two reasons: to see what all the fuss was about, since few people like it, and also so that I could ask Izmet to read my fortune from the coffee grounds.

WELL. I don't think I hated Turkish coffee. But it's definitely not something I would drink every day if I had a choice between that and tea, whereas here in Rome I'm much more likely to go with a cappuccino. As for my fortune.... I'm still a little skeptical about these kinds of things, but I tried to make myself look as anonymous as possible, didn't give anything away, and was still told some very accurate things. It could still apply to anyone, but let's just say that I'm glad with what Izmet told me.

Tokens for tea! Men are always seen running around the bustling crowds in the markets with trays of tea. They deliver drinks and collect empty glasses and tokens. Merchants, vendors, and shopkeepers are always busy with their job, so they buy their tea in advance through tokens, for a few weeks or a month at a time.

- Afterwards, we split up again. Eric recommended we take a ferry out to Üsküdar and take advantage of the sun's appearance in the sky. Steph, Chrissy, and I raced the clock to buy some last-minute presents from the Spice Market, then jumped on a ferry to see the beautiful silhouette of the mosques rising out of the landscape of houses. Of course, this is when my camera died on me and I could only get a couple of not-so-great pictures. We sketched the first mosque we saw for about half an hour, ran outside to see the sun set behind the mosques, hopped on a ferry to go back to our original point, and met up with everyone for a final group dinner in Istanbul. I'm so glad we went.

Day 7

- I mailed a couple of postcards when I ran out the door to board the bus that would bring us to the airport. We left in the morning and arrived in Rome early in the afternoon. There was such a quick transition from one place to another that I feel like the entire trip never happened.

But then I remember everything I took back with me, physically and otherwise.

It definitely happened.